i've prayed and asked God that no one in my family or close my family ever gets a chronic disease, terminally ill. I always ask God to bless me & everyone in my family and everyone close to my family with another day and another year. Is that an unrealistic request, because I know we all can't be promised another day, every day. When my cousin died when I was in 7th grade, I thought it might have been because I didnt say my prayers that night, the one in which I thought I would secure another day for my family by asking God. I've been let down. Brett. Grandma Ethel. Uncle Ken. Uncle Jerald. Granddaddy. Grandma. I've been let down. Why pray? I have been let down! my family is my everything. The bad things in life are more painful than all the happy times. Because, I never forget. I don't know what to do or say. How can I be there? We need each other. I cry for you. and myself. I love them all. why? why do things happen? bad things? how can they say lay your burdens on the Lord? they are heavily weighing on my mind! I will do for her what she did for me, when I needed it so bad. Thank you. but I need it too because I'm hurting now as well. why? I love her, and her, and her. Please restore their health and my heart.
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i feel better. talked to Key. I love her. Called myself calling to be there for her, but I needed her. it was like i was a crying baby who saw her mom & knew everything was gonna be ok. my family, we do that for each other. what would I do without Key. I was a wreck a few seconds ago, my face burns from tears. but I'm ok now. i'm ok.